Friday, December 10, 2010

Outskirts Press provides publicity
for a book publicist who apparently
flunked fourth-grade English

"What exactly is a Literary Agent and what do they do?"

"What exactly is a Publicist and what do they do?"

These questions demonstrate lack of parallelism and were written by Lisa Orrell. 

The shitty sentence structure shown above comes from her poorly written guest post on the Outskirts Press Blog. Outskirts is the often-inept self-publishing company that has misspelled its own name, posted inaccurate web links, named the wrong publisher of Roget's Thesaurus, called a preface a foreword, produced the world's worst press releases and committed dozens of other sins.

In an apparent "you-kiss-my-ass-and-I'll-kiss-your-ass" deal that has become common in publishing, Lisa has a YouTube video which hypes an overpriced and padded book published by Outskirts. The book's cover  promises that it "Reveals Top-Secret 'How-to' Tips Guaranteed to Increase Sales."
  • There are NO secrets and NO guarantees in the book.
  • Lisa says it's a "great book that I highly recommend."
Lisa wants us to know that she, "The Promote U Guru, is an in-demand Branding & Marketing Expert and Certified Success Coach with over 20-years of experience. For select clients, she also acts as their Publicist. Lisa works with small business owners, solopreneurs, speakers and authors. She herself is the author of 3 books and a professional speaker, and has been interviewed by countless media, including: NY Times, Wall Street Journal,,, ABC, MSNBC and NPR."

Lisa apparently wrote the horrid paragraph above. She may be a "Certified Success Coach" and "professional speaker," but she desperately needs someone to teach her to write proper English. When she gets paid to speak, I hope she speaks better than she writes.


  1. You may be wrong about Lisa flunking fourth-grade English.

    In some cities, parallelism isn't taught until sixth grade.

  2. If she has a diploma from anywhere, it should be revoked.

    I hope her books are written better than the blog.