Writers should try being copyeditors

Regular readers of this blog know that I frequently write lengthy critiques of books. In addition to the critiques I publish here, I sometimes critique books for authors -- privately and for free -- if I think a book is worthy of 'fixing' but don't want to embarrass the author. I've formed some nice online friendships this way.

I even have a business called Rent A Book Reviewer that provides pre-publication critiques

I recently posted an online critique for a book on a website that announced the book.

Although some may see my critique as "unmerciful," the author realized that I was right, and hired me to be a copyeditor. 

Back in the 60s I became the copyeditor on my college newspaper, the Brown & White at Lehigh. While my main motivation for becoming "copy ed" was to keep others from butchering what I had written, it turned out that I really liked copyediting, and apparently I did it well.

The skills I developed editing in college helped me later in the 'real world' when I worked as a magazine editor, advertising copywriter, journalist -- and author.

There is probably no page, paragraph or sentence that can't be improved by chopping or shifting some words. That's part of what a copyeditor does. Other duties include fixing grammar and spelling errors, and maintaining editorial "style" -- such things as making sure "5:30pm" is not on one page but "7:15 AM" is on another page. The copyeditor has to have a good memory, and sharp eyes to notice a missing close-quote, wrong font, oversize or undersize indents and extra spaces between words.

• While every author must edit her own work, I think you can become a better writer if you try editing someone else's work. Without your own ego protecting the sanctity of your words, you can be unmerciful, and the techniques and tools you develop will improve your own books.

Pick almost any book and start marking it up or make notes on your PC. If you can get a text in editable form, that's even better. Even a Kindle book viewed on your PC allows you to make notes. You can also work on blog posts and websites, even advertising.

This exercise may not lead to a second career as an editor, but you'll probably become a better writer.

I've written a (bestselling) book about editing your own work which should also help you edit others' work. It's called Self-Editing for Self-Publishers: What to do before the real editor starts editing or if you're the only editor. If you find it useful, I'd appreciate a complimentary comment on Amazon. If you hate it, write an unmerciful critique. I can take it.

The whores of publishing: trade magazines

When I was a kid, I loved electronics. I went to Lehigh University to major in electrical engineering. I quickly realized it was a mistake and for my second semester I switched to journalism. During summers, I worked in retailing.

This combination made me the perfect candidate for my first post-college job, Assistant Editor of High Fidelity Trade News. It was  a magazine that served hi-fi dealers.

My starting salary (in 1970) was just $115 per week, but I had an impressive title. And unlike some of my classmates, I was working on a slick magazine in Manhattan, not a weekly newspaper in Duluth.

One thing I did not learn in life or at Lehigh, however, was how "trade journalism" works.

• Publications that provide free subscriptions to hi-fi dealers (or gas station operators,  dentists or practitioners of any occupation) are completely dependent on advertising revenue.

Because of this dependency, there was none of the "church-and-state" separation of the editorial and advertising staffs that I had been taught was normal in journalism.

At The New Yorker, a Lehigh professor told me, editors and ad salesmen were not even allowed to be in an elevator together. Upper management feared that an ad guy would try to get an editor to provide positive coverage for an actual or potential advertiser even if there was nothing newsworthy happening.

Trade journalism is completely different.

At my first job, any news, no matter how insignificant, was treated as BIG NEWS, if it would help win or keep an advertising contract.

The magazine's boss was not really the editor, but Ken Nelson, the advertising manager. He planned our editorial coverage, i.e., ass-kissing.

At one press conference where a manufacturer was showing new products, we had two real editorial people, plus the production manager making believe he was a reporter, and an ad salesman making believe he was a photographer. He flashed his strobe light at dramatic moments, but there was no film in his camera. (Back then, cameras used film.)

We were not the only ones. Some other magazines were even worse whores than we were. I remember an industry event where Stanley Kermish, an over-eager ad man, was introduced to the boss of a hi-fi equipment manufacturer. The second sentence out of Stan's mouth was, "We're thinking of putting your new product on the cover."

I've been away from trade journalism for about 40 years and hadn't thought much about it until recently.

Publishers Weekly is an important magazine and I read nearly every issue to keep up with trends and news. One issue of the usually respectable magazine took me back to the bad old days. I felt like puking.

Although PW does charge for subscriptions (for its paper edition) it is very dependent on advertising, and now appears to be willing to get into bed with the sleaziest of the sleazy if the relationship might bring in a few bucks.

On March 29, 2010, PW referred to Author Solutions as a "vanity publishing company" which probably really pissed off Author Solutions. The company prefers to be known as "the world leader in indie book publishing." 

The PW management apparently realized that most of the ad money of the growing self-publishing business has been spent in Writers Digest and for online ads -- and PW wants a piece of the action.

In a dramatic reversal (I know that's a hackneyed phrase, but it's appropriate here), the 12/21/09 issue of PW contains some of the most blatant, ill-advised and ignorant ass-kissing I've ever read. A puff-piece by Lynn Andriani portrays Kevin Weiss, "CEO of self-publishing giant Author Solutions," as a combination of Moses, Jesus, Washington, Franklin, Ghandi, Salk, Jobs and Gates.

Apparently, PW badly needs advertising revenue from Author Solutions. 

My stupid popcorn mistake will NOT be repeated today

I've been a James Bond fan since I was a teenager. I missed Dr. No in 1962, but starting with From Russia With Love in 1963, I've seen every movie in a theater, usually on opening day. Hot babes and cool cars are hard to resist. From Russia is probably my favorite bit of Bondage.

I have every JB movie at home. Some I have on VHS tape, laserDisc and DVD! That's devotion.

Movies in theaters are usually expensive naps for me, so I only go for really important flix. Last one I saw was Jimmy Bond in Skyfall, in 2012.

At 4pm today, I'll see Star Trek Into Darkness. It's 129 minutes long, but there should be enough zooming, smashing, crashing and blasting to keep me awake. 

Skyfall was 143 minutes long, and though there was less zooming, smashing, crashing and blasting than in a Trek movie, I stayed awake thru the entire thing. I'd probably enjoy the new Great Gatsby, but it's too pokey to keep me awake for 142 minutes. I'll see it at home, where I can repeatedly rewind and restart.

I made a dumb mistake at Skyfall last year that I will not repeat today. I paid about $40 (well, not quite) for a humongous tub of popcorn which I thought would last for 143 minutes if I paced myself. Alas, I hit bottom at the 84-minute mark and had to watch the rest of the movie unassisted. On the way out of the theater, I noticed a sign offering FREE REFILLS on humongous tubs of PC. Today I'll know what to do.

I saw J. J. Abrams's first ST flick, simply called Star Trek, on opening day in 2009. I saw it mid-afternoon in a nearly empty theater. There were a few Gen-X mommies with babies, and some aging baby boomers like me. It was a great flick, with delicious doses of retro humor that only a few of us senior citizens laughed at. I hope for more geezer guffaws today.

Beam me up! (And put extra butter on the popcorn, please.) 

Does Publishers Weekly need a new editor?

New York's First Espresso Book Machine Debuts at McNally Jackson

By Craig Morgan Teicher 

While New York's downtown indie bookseller McNally Jackson has had the city's first Espresso Book Machine (which can print and bind books from, among other sources, Google Books, Lightening Lightning Source, or from files supplied by authors) for about a month, the store help held a coming out party for it on Tuesday, February 15.

That's two silly bloopers in one paragraph. Ouch!

Tweaking your work can be terrible -- or wonderful

When I was writing for Rolling Stone in the early 1970s, I was always rewriting until the last possible minute. This was in the pre-fax, pre-email era, and I'd drive to the airport and pay to have my column air-freighted from NY to CA. There wasn't much profit left.

Words are almost toys for me, like a child's building blocks, Lincoln Logs (above), Lego or an Erector Set. I love to play with words, to rearrange them and try alternatives. Rewriting sentences and changing page formatting -- especially now with a computer -- is fun. 

The danger is that a perfectionist never finishes anything.

When I was working as an advertising copywriter, I was notorious for not "releasing" an ad until the last possible moment. Fortunately, someone older and wiser taught me a valuable lesson: sometimes "good enough" really is good enough, and I learned to let go.

Now, as the owner of a small publishing company, I have to be a businessman as well as an artist. I realize that no money will come in if I don't approve a proof and let a book start selling.

However, I seldom stop editing. I even re-do old blog entries (including this one).

The New Yorker magazine has an excellent article about Steve Jobs, which says that his real genius was tweaking -- not inventing. You can read it for free online.

I'm a tweaker, too, but being a tweaker can be dangerous because nothing is ever really finished. (When I was in college, I was still building bookshelves a week before I was due to move out of my apartment.)

Printing on demand and ebooks make it easy to keep tweaking. Maybe too easy.

With POD and e I can make improvements to my books whenever I want to. 
Unfortunately, sometimes when I should be working on new books, I instead work on old ones.

Most of my books go through hundreds of revisions but the first one to be published is good enough to not embarrass me. A person who buys version 2.13 gets a better book than the person who bought 1.28, but I know that each version was "good enough" as of a particular moment. 

One time I decided to delay a book by a week so I could change a comma to a period and uppercase the next letter. I doubt that anyone else would have noticed the perceived imperfection -- but I could not let it be.

Steve Jobs may have been more of a perfectionist than I am, the ultimate tweaker; and my iPad is better because of his obsession. I hope my books are perceived as better because of my obsession. One of my books is now nearly two years behind schedule. It's getting better and better.

(Illustration from The New Yorker)

Choose a headline:(a) Christie Storm is a misinformed journalist who misinforms her readers.(b) Newspaper's religion editor provides publicity for evil Author Solutions.

"Print-on-demand or 'indie' publishing . . ."

"Print-on-demand or self-published books . . ."

(from an article by Christie Storm, Religion Editor of the Arkansas Democrat-Gazette, in Arkansas Online.)

Hey, Christie:

1. POD is not the same thing as either indie publishing or self-publishing.
2. Indie publishing existed long before POD, and POD is used by many kinds of publishers, not just indie publishers.
3. Self-publishing existed long before POD, and POD is used by many kinds of publishers, not just self-publishers.
4. If you want to be taken seriously as a journalist, stop using press releases from  Author Solutions as a source of information about the book business. Don't help the company to spread self-serving misinformation. Its agenda should not be a newspaper's agenda.
5. If you want to be taken seriously as a journalist, change your name. "Christie Storm" sounds like a stripper or a porn star -- not a religion editor or a winner of the Pulitzer prize.
6. Tell your boss to hire a fact-checker.

Cheap self-publishing is getting more expensive.Free self-publishing isn't really free.

Self-publishing companies sell their services in packages priced from under $200 to many thousands of dollars. A few companies even advertise FREE publishing. It’s very important to know what you need, what you’ll get, and what you won’t get.

Can you really get a book published for less than $200, or for free? Maybe.

Strangely named Aachanon Publishing, which had offered a $195 publishing package, has apparently gone out of business.

Strangely named Wasteland Press has raised the price of its least expensive package from $195 to $245.

Inept and dishonest Outskirts Press still offers a nearly useless $199 package. 

The $199 Emerald publishing package from Outskirts actually provides what looks like a “real” book. The package is notable not for what it includes, but for what it excludes.

Most notable is the lack of an ISBN (International Standard Book Number), which means that the book can’t be sold by bookstores. An Emerald book is not even available on the Outskirts online bookstore.

For $199 you are limited to one book size (5.5 by 8.5 inches) and a choice of two cover designs. You get exactly one book which you can read, give away, sell or display on your mantelpiece. You can order more books if you want to. They won’t be pretty, but they are books.

The top package from Outskirts costs $1,099. Some other publishers may charge over $50,000. Be careful. A big investment won’t guarantee a great book, and may kill any chance of making a profit. Be sure of your goals and your budget, and act accordingly.

Some of the websites and ads for self-publishing companies tout “free” publishing programs. What you get for free is hot air. Create­Space, Lulu, UniBook and others will not charge you when you upload your book’s files—but if you want real books, you pay real money. (These companies assume you will do all of the design, editing and promotional work yourself or hire others to do it.)

How can they publish a book for free? They can’t. They’re lying.

Their publishing is free as long as you don’t expect any books to be produced. Every book they print, or distribute as an ebook, is paid for. Their notion of publishing does not include the final product—a book.

CreateSpace is an Amazon subsidiary that says it lets you “Self-Publish a Book-Free.” The only free things I could find on its website are “free tools to prepare your content for publication” and an ISBN that identifies CreateSpace (not you) as the publisher. If you want CreateSpace to do more of the work in designing, producing, promoting and distributing your books, you can pay up to $4,999 for a publishing package. (I sometimes use CreateSpace for printing and distribution, but nothing else.)

Beware of companies that don’t provide distribution to booksellers. DiggyPOD can produce excellent books and will ship cartons to you or to any place you specify. However, the company has no system to make your books available to booksellers.

In a comparison webpage, DiggyPOD claims that CreateSpace charges extra for laminated covers and it’s hard to find a phone number for support. Both claims are untrue.

UniBook says, “Your book is instantly available for purchase worldwide in the UniBook online bookstore.” Unfortunately, like DiggyPOD, UniBook has no way to get your books to stores or online booksellers, and its books are very expensive.

InstantPublisher has a helpful website, but no distribution to booksellers and its minimum order quantity is 25 books. Other companies—such as CreateSpace—have no minimum.

Maverick Publications says it provides “full-service book printing” and “self-publishing.” Its prices are MUCH higher than Lightning Source or CreateSpace, it takes MUCH longer, and has no distribution.

Maverick’s online bookstore shows exactly one book—from 2001. After 12 years, it has ZERO reviews on Amazon and a sales rank below 5,000,000. That's not very impressive for a company that promises "Marketing Strategies and Promotional Materials" and "Help with Selling your book on Amazon."

Being a good storyteller doesn't mean you're a good author or publisher

A while ago, on the SPAN website, I read a very poorly prepared book announcement written by a good storyteller who needs help making the transition to publisher.

The new book is in a genre (Christian "end times" fiction) that I have no interest in. I probably would not have read beyond the headline, but that headline was so terribly amateurish (and so unnecessarily terrible) that I read more and found more to complain about.

The announcement's title is "Times of Trouble a Christian fiction End Times novel."  (Emphasis added)

Author Cliff Ball says he has published six books and has a BA degree in English.

Hey Cliff, I'd think that by now you'd know that it's not necessary to point out that a novel is fiction (unless it's being compared to a "non-fiction novel" like Truman Capote's In Cold Blood). I realize that Midwestern State University in Wichita Falls is not Harvard or Yale, but surely some professor must have pointed that out. Sadly, the ugly template-derived book cover repeats the redundancy error.

The book promo is flawed by sloppy writing and grammatical errors:

• Cliff says "many Americans had known for over two hundred years." Huh? How many Americans live for more than 200 years?
• Also, "Told in first person point of view, Brian Atwood, our main character, is . . ." Brian is not told in first-person, the book is.
• "His work involves mostly cyber terrorism . . . ." That sounds like he is a terrorist, not someone who fights terrorism.
• Brian's faith is tested every day as he deals with a man that [should be "who"] has no morals . . . ." 

On the SPAN site, I pointed out some of the errors and said, "I hope the book is better edited than this promo, and I strongly urge you to re-do the promo before you circulate it further."

Sadly, I then found the same poorly crafted promo on Cliff's website, booksellers' sites, and even on the back cover of the book.

The back cover bio tells us that Cliff "was led to the Lord when he was five by his mother." How could anyone who writes such a crappy sentence have a degree in the English language? Could I be five by my mother? Cliff -- or an editor -- should have rewritten this.

Sadly, the book apparently had no editor ("Delaney's" is not the plural of "Delaney," "withdrawal of Iraq" should be "from Iraq," "look-out" doesn't need a hyphen). Apparently it has no designer, either.

The cover uses a common and uninteresting CreateSpace template. The interior is ugly and screams "AMATEUR." The text is set flush-left and there are no hyphens -- so pages are ragged and jagged. Even if Cliff was too broke or too egomaniacal to hire a designer, a little bit of research could have led to a much nicer book.

The copyright page says that the book was published by Cliff Ball. This is not Cliff's first book. When he produced his first book, he should have established a name for his publishing company.

• An amateur's book has to compete with professionals' books. It has to look professional. It's not difficult.
• Cliff's website is as amateurish as his book. The beginning says: "Welcome to the website of Cliff Ball. Hi there! Welcome to my site. . . . Please check out my site." ENOUGH! We get the point. Cliff says, "The Bible . . . is a unique book unlike any other." If it's unique, it's unlike any other. Where's the editor?
• The book trailer is very simple, a little bit interesting, but as sloppy as the rest of Cliff's work ("Down's Syndrome" should be "Down  Syndrome.")
• Cliff brags that the book was "Nominated for the 2012 Global Ebook Awards." Anyone who pays $79 can have a book nominated. A nomination is not the same as winning.
• While I have no interest in Christian fiction (I'm not even sure why it exists) or the "end times," and almost never read fiction, I did read enough of the online preview to know that Cliff is a good storyteller. It's a shame that he doesn't care enough about his words to invest in professional editing and design. Sadly, many other authors make the same mistake.

One Amazon reviewer wrote: "I found myself disappointed with this book, most especially because the cover of the book states that this is the author's sixth book, and his degree is in English. A good editing would have been a great help to the story. While the story line was an interesting one, I found the quality of writing left a lot to be desired. There were enough grammatical and punctuation errors to be distracting."

Another said: "I had ordered and read another book by this author. It was so poorly written that I removed it, didn't even read this one and also removed it from my Kindle. Not worth the effort or the $."

And another: "It was OK, but seemed amateurish. I was hoping for something a little more professional."

----------------

The mission of SPAN (Small Publishers Association of North America) is to support self publishing authors and independent publishing companies as a non-profit trade association. It provides a lot of valuable services to both established pros and newbies. I've been a SPAN member for several years, and recommend it.

Writers often use its website as a venue to announce new books, and perhaps to get the attention of other members, and maybe get them to buy, read and recommend the books.

Since SPAN is an alliance of sympathetic supporters of small publishers, I'd think that someone with a new book to promote would try really hard to impress members.

The inventor of English did a terrible job

Consider the letter sequence GHOTI.

Pronounce the "gh" as in "rough."

Pronounce the "o" as in "women."

Pronounce the "ti" as in "nation."

Brad Bitt pic from mirror.co.uk. Fish pic from Coloradofisherman.com

Even in the E-era, don't neglect hardcover books

Books have always been extremely important to me. As the photo shows, even as a little kid, I used the bathroom as a library so not a moment of potential reading time was wasted. In 2013, the only piece of furniture I can visualize from the Bronx apartment my parents brought me home to in 1946 is a mahogany bookshelf. As a child with an early bedtime, I read books by flashlight under the blanket. Even now, I share my bed with my wife, our dog, and usually a book or my iPad or Kindle Fire.

Before TiVo gave me the ability to fast-forward, I always read during TV commercials. I read at most meals -- even at restaurants. Some people think it's rude. I think it's efficient.

I've always had a strong reverence for books. Maybe it comes from my parents, who were avid readers. As a Jew, I am part of "the people of the book." When I was in college, I sometimes spent food money on books (and on records, too, I admit). I was still building bookshelves two weeks before I was due to move out of my college apartment.

When I see books in the trash, I rescue them. When a friend's older brother and his buddies gathered around a barbecue grill at the end of the school year to burn their school books, I tried to rescue the books, but was blocked by superior force. Assholes!

I seldom think of sin, but if sins do exist, book burning is certainly high on the list.

After writing paperbacks since 1977 and ebooks since 2009, in 2011 I received a proof of my first hardcover, a new format for my "stories" book. The book feels very good. It looks beautiful, with a glossy dust jacket and the title and my name stamped in bright golden ink on the cloth covering the binding.

A hardcover book provides a special experience. Perhaps ebooks will replace paperbacks, but I don't think anything can replace hardcovers.

Torah scrolls are still handwritten, after thousands of years. Grave stones are still chiseled. Initials are still carved on trees. They should still be readable long after the last Kindle and Nook are recycled.

Even though I am the sole employee of my publishing company, this book seems about 96% as "professional" as a similar Tina Fey book from publishing giant Hachette. Even though I've seen my cover design and read the title hundreds of times, I can't resist holding it, feeling it and studying it. Even though I've read my own words hundreds of times, I can't resist reading again.

I got the idea to write this book way back when I was 11 or 12. I recently became 67. I'm not sure if this book represents my life's work, but if it does, that's OK with me. I'm very proud of the book (I've never thought that pride is sinful.)  I honestly think it's a very good book and fortunately, so do the readers.

The hardcover book seems so much more "real" than other formats. I'm almost in awe of it and don’t want to mark it up with a red pen as I do with my paperback proofs. It would seem like defacing a library book -- and that's a sin.

I had no plan to publish this hardcover. I published it because of requests from people who had bought the paperback or ebook and wanted a hardcover to give as gifts. It's important to give readers what they want. I like giving it as a gift, too.

It doesn't cost much to produce a hardcover using print on demand from LightningSource. It gives me another format that some readers prefer, and it might impress book reviewers more than a paperback or ebook would.

Why and how to make your pbook longer or shorter

Your printed book can’t have just any number of pages you want it to have. One fundamental restriction is that the number must be even, even if one or more pages are blank.

Each sheet of paper in a book, called a leaf, has two sides (pages). If your book has 300 pages, it requires 150 leaves. If you have 301 pages, it requires 151 leaves and you'll have one blank page after page 301.

It’s pretty common for books to have more than one blank page at the end (or even in the beginning). Additionally, the signatures (large sheets of paper that are printed on before cutting and binding) may dictate that books be composed of multiples of specific numbers, such as 4, 8 or 16. If you come up short or long, you’ll need to write more words or stretch the book to fill up blank pages, or cut words or tighten-up to use one less signature.

You probably have a “target” length for your book, and maybe you’ve missed the target.

Perhaps you think that in order to justify your price, you should be providing at least 300 pages, but you only have 289. Maybe you think a 300-page book will overwhelm some people, but you’ve come up with 311. Maybe your printing budget and cover price will cover a 240-page book but not 250 pages. Maybe you want to offer more pages than a competitive book. Maybe you want a thicker book so the title printed on the spine will be bigger.

There are many ways to reduce the number of pages without cutting important words, and it’s also easy to increase the number of pages even if you have nothing more to say.

Some of the tricks for increasing or decreasing the page count can also improve the appearance of a book by eliminating orphans or other typographic misfortunes, such as two or three words that make a chapter take up an extra page.

Try saying things differently. If you wrote “increasing or decreasing,” space could be saved by substituting “altering” or “modifying” without significantly changing the meaning.

Take advantage of shorter words and contractions. “Pasta” takes up less space than “macaroni” or “spaghetti.” “Group” and “club” are shorter than “organization.” “Can’t” takes up less space than “can not.” Sometimes eliminating just one or two characters can eliminate a page.

Change to different margins. Even using 1/16 of an inch less can save many pages.

   Use pigger pages.

Use fewer or smaller illustrations, or pack you type closer to them.

Use smaller size type, either in the whole book or in sections like the table of contents or bibliography. Even a one-point difference can save a lot of pages if you make the change in the whole book. Be careful not to sacrifice readability.

Use a narrower typeface.

Make bulleted lists flush-left instead of indented.

Skip middle names.

It’s equally easy to pad or stretch the book to make it longer. Don’t be obvious if you have to do this. Don’t use 16-pt type instead of 11. It didn’t fool your history teacher who wanted 10 pages about Abe Lincoln and you only had enough words to fill nine pages with normal size letters. You won’t fool people who review or buy your book, either.

If you have to stretch, use a combination of techniques, in moderation. Don’t use one in excess. Try some of these:

Always start chapters on a recto page.

Put more white space around photos, charts, tables and illustrations.

If you just want a bigger spine to print your title on but don’t care about more pages, use thicker paper. Cream (a/k/a “crème”) is usually thicker than white.

Add more photos, charts, tables and illustrations.

Make photos, charts, tables and illustrations larger.

Start chapters in the middle of a page instead of at the top.

Put quotes or helpful hints on individual pages.

Break up paragraphs into smaller paragraphs.

Add some words.

Use longer words.

Define technical terms when you introduce them.

Have more front matter, such as a half-title page ("bastard title") ahead of the title page. I used to think It’s a stupid waste of paper, but I've used it for some recent books. It's a good place for autographs.

Use bulleted lists instead of paragraphs with many items separated by commas.

Increase the spacing between lines in a list.

Spell out some names instead of using initials or abbreviations: “John Pierpont Morgan” takes up more space than “J. P. Morgan.”

Include a summary at the beginning or end of chapters and sections.

Include a bibliography listing additional resources.

Put an order form in the back of the book.

   Use smaller pages.

Use pull-quotes (also known as a lift-quote or call-quote). They’re excerpts from the book printed in a larger typeface and inserted in the page, surrounded by white space, with the main text wrapped around it. It’s difficult to read a sentence that is broken by a text box or illustration, so keep it to one side. If you have two columns, it’s OK to center it.

You can also make a book seem longer than it really is.

In many books, sections of the front matter have no printed page numbers ("blind folios") or they display roman numerals. If you include the table of contents and introduction in your overall numbering sequence, you might be able to make the last numbered page reach 307 instead of 297, which could give you an advantage. Don't put numbers on pages before the table of contents. Be aware that booksellers and distributors may show different page totals than you come up with.

What if Obama refuses to write a blurb for your book?Also, beware of blurb whores and blurb swappers.

Every author dreams of having cover blurbs (endorsements) from famous people who'll say nice things which may entice people to buy books.

Often, especially for a new author with a new book, it's just not possible to get the attention of a celebrity or expert who will add authority to yours.

That doesn't mean your book has to be blurbless.

There's nothing wrong with asking for and using blurbs from friends and family if what they say will be appropriate to your book. Later on, if the President or Lindsay Lohan falls in love with your words, you can revise the cover to incorporate the new comments.

My first self-published book was I Only Flunk My Brightest Students: stories from school and real life (2008). It deals with my life. It made perfect sense to use blurbs from people who know me, rather than some distant Nobel Prize winner.

The book is funny. Identifying Howard Krosnick, the source of my front cover blurb, as "author's classmate since first grade" is almost a parody of the traditional stuffy IDs ("professor of Indo-Eurasion folk medicine at the University of Guatemala), and reinforces the mood of the book. Howie said, "I couldn't stop reading. I couldn't stop laughing." blurbs don't get better than that.

Stories I'd Tell My Children (but maybe not until they're adults) is an updated replacement for the 'flunk' book. It has a fantastic cover blurb which says, "This book is so funny that I nearly peed in my pants. My girlfriend didn't think it was funny, so I got a new girlfriend."

The blurber, Nicholas Santiago, is someone I know through business. His words are sufficient. I see no need to explain who he is, and I doubt that Lindsay could have written a better recommendation. I received "five stars" and some nice words from the Midwest Book Review -- but those words are not as funny as Nick's words.

Most blurbs I've seen are written by authors, and many of them are not well known authors. Apparently "Author A" thinks she or he will gain some useful publicity by having a quote printed on the cover of a book written by "Author B."

 

(above) Barbara Barth wrote a wonderful book, The Unfaithful Widow: Fragmented Memoirs Of My First Year Alone. The back cover shows great reviews from authors Philip Nutman and Patrice Dickey. I never heard of them. The reviews on Amazon from 'ordinary' readers may be more persuasive. 

• Try to avoid obvious blurb swaps (“I’ll kiss your ass if you kiss mine.”) Tit-for-tat is tacky.  
• Some authors are apparently so desperate for publicity that they become 'blurb whores.' I know of one author whose name seems to be on many more book covers as a blurber than an author. When someone writes a huge number of blurbs -- particularly for books in the same field -- the blurbs (and the blurber) lose credibility. 
• Avoid blurbs (and reviews) from people who are connected with your book. I know of one book that carries a blurb from an employee of its publisher, and another with an Amazon review from the book's editor. 

There's nothing wrong with your acting as a writing coach for your blurbers. You can even write a complete blurb and ask someone to "adopt" it.

If you’ve written a how-to book, the best blurbs will come from people who have actually been helped by it. A good way to find “amateur” blurbers who might write sincere comments about actually benefiting from your book is to observe online communities that are concerned with your subject. If you find articulate people with problems your book solves, offer to send them free advance copies (even PDFs if bound copies are not yet available or if you will not be publishing on paper) in exchange for their comments. You can say that you’d like to know if the book was helpful and how it can be improved. Mention that you might like to quote their comments, but don’t guarantee it.

James & Geoff. Which one did I sit next to on a plane?

Don’t be too timid to approach famous authors, politicians, business leaders and celebrities, especially if you have something in common which can create a bond. You might be pleas­antly surprised.

Write a good letter and explain how you think the book relates to the prospective blurber. Find a reason to compliment the candidate. If possible, refer to a time when you were in the same place, perhaps during a speech or a book signing or on an airplane. (I once sat next to James Earl Jones. Hmm. Actually, it may have been Geoffrey Holder.)

Short blurbs are usually better than long blurbs. Humorous blurbs (if appropriate) are often better than serious blurbs.

Request blurbs as long in advance as possible -- as soon as you have a draft of your book that is good enough to show. The book does not have to be complete. You can probably get by with an introduction, a table of contents, and a few chapters sent as a PDF. If you want a blurb from someone famous, it’s probably better to send an ARC than a PDF.

Incorporate good “early” blurbs into your back cover and first page as soon as possible. If other blurbers read them, they may be more likely to write similarly positive comments.

Mike Duran discusses blurb etiquette.

Be careful. Every word a writer writes is an audition.

I just read the following in an online group: "For a short period of time the ebook addition will be on sale for only 99 cents."

Ouch. "Addition" should be "edition." This is very bad advertising for a book. It's an immediate turn-off. 

Most writers have specialties. They can be novels, plays, poems, travel brochures, magazine articles, ads, fortune cookie inserts, skywriting, sermons, almost anything.

Despite our favorites and specialties, most of us write in multiple venues and formats. We frequently have websites and blogs, and post comments on blogs and in forums. We write love letters and hate mail, send thank-you notes, help kids with homework, write letters to editors and submit resumes and pitch-letters.

It's important that those of us who have writing careers never go "off-duty." We have to produce professional-caliber work all of the time, even if it's just a 20-word Tweet or a three-word reply to an email.

Never excuse sloppiness. Never say, "It's only an email."

It would be a shame to turn off a prospective reader or lose possible business because of silly, easily corrected errors. It could be a disaster to let the sloppiness of an informal medium infect professional writing.

A while ago I read the blog of a writer who had attended a writing conference.

I see no point in embarrassing the writer, so I won't reveal the name or even the gender.

The writer said that someone "range" [rang] the doorbell, wore "sheek" [chic] clothing and that something is "cheep" [cheap].

This person also wrote "nation-wide" [nationwide], "main stream" [mainstream], "self published" [self-published] and more.

This person mentioned "the hard work of revising and polishing" a book.

The blog deserved similar hard work.

Confession: I am not perfect, but I try to be. It's wrong not to try to write right, or to rely on a computer's spell-checker.